Spam and Eggs: Gems from the Spam Filter

If you’ve blogged (or twittered) for a while, you’ve probably harvested at least a crop or two of spam.

Ah, the spammers are in bloom again…isn’t it lovely *inhales*

In fact, they may have even been your very first comments. But, as time passed and the spam filter grew fat with bizarrely worded pseudo-comments, you probably began to resent them…especially when the spam far outweighed the legitimate comments.

But maybe we’re not giving spam its due. Sure, most of the time, the “comments” are only fit for the compost bin. But, sometimes, you harvest a few gems, stuff that makes you laugh and/or makes good fodder for a blog post when you’re running a little low on ideas. Maybe it even has something to teach us, as author Jami Gold points out.

Recently, I had a bumper crop, mostly in response to Thus Spake the Dragon and Got Apocalypse. Here are a few prize specimen:

“Hi there, just became aware of your blog through Google, and found that it’s really informative. I’m going to watch out for brussels. I will be grateful if you continue this in future”

Indeed, you are wise to watch out for brussels. They are tricky beasts. Relax your vigilance for just a moment and they’ll sneak up behind you and stick a spit-moistened finger in your ear, then you’ll be a brussel too…don’t say I didn’t warn you.

“Certainly there are millions of more pleasurable times up front for people who browse through your blog.”

Oh yes, millions of pleasurable times up front…but it’s the pay off over time that’s the real joy. We’re talking gazillions here. Gazillions of pleasurable times. Plus…the hardcore facts that will save you from the apocalypse.

“My husband and i have been absolutely relieved that Michael could do his inquiry with the precious recommendations he discovered through your blog. “

This was from Got Apocalypse. You see, their son Michael was inquiring into the process of become a Certified Apocalypse Survival Instructor and the movies I shared were critical to his education. So, study up, folks. The apocalypse is nigh.

“You completed a number of good points there. I did a search on the theme and found mainly people will go along with your blog.”

Mainly, they do…but there is a dissenting faction. We’re planning to take care of them by sending in the dreaded brussels.

“Thank you a lot for providing individuals with remarkably terrific opportunity to read in detail from here. It really is very sweet and also jam-packed with a lot of fun for me personally and my office peers to search your website at least thrice every week to learn the latest guides you have got. Not to mention, I’m so certainly happy with the staggering inspiring ideas served by you.”

You hear that folks? Thrice weekly. Not just once or twice, but thrice. I’m that good.

“I want to express my thanks to you just for bailing me out of this situation. Because of browsing throughout the the net and meeting suggestions that were not beneficial, I was thinking my entire life was gone. Living minus the answers to the problems you have fixed as a result of your good article content is a critical case, and the ones that might have badly affected my entire career if I had not come across your blog post. “

Again, when the apocalypse rolls around and the brussels are attacking in hordes, you’ll be glad you read my blog.

“I was suggested this blog by my cousin. I am not sure whether this post is written by him as nobody else know such detailed about my problem. You’re incredible! Thanks!”

It’s true. Your cousin did write this. He didn’t want to but I made him. I threatened to lock him in a room with a brussel.  In the end, though, he saw that writing the post was the right thing to do. For you and the the world.

“I loved as much as you’ll receive carried out right here. “

And this one is just sheer philosophical brilliance. Think about it. The love we receive must be carried out to others. *tears up*

Of course, a ripe crop of spam isn’t the only collateral benefit of blogging. You may find also find tasty search term bits here and there. author Chuck Wendig is famous for  the wild search terms that roam his blog. Check out some of his search term bingos: Search Term Bingo and the Revenge of the Hamster Skin Codpiece, Search Term Bingopocalypse, and Search Term Bingo Stole My Dingo.

Incidentally, spam is very good with eggs. And fried rice. And ramen. And…

Have you harvested any delicious spam or caught any wild search terms? What are your favorites?

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Image Attribution (In Order of Appearance):
Spam & Eggs by Todd Smith, on Flickr CC BY-NC-ND 2.0
Spam and Eggs by Samwoo E, on Flickr  CC BY-NC 2.0

If you missed Marcia’s post on creating passion in our lives, be sure to check it out! And stay tuned for David Walker’s post on Wednesday.